His Winter Heart: Gay Romance Read online

  "I'm still cold. Let's get cozy," Colin demanded. He looked Wes up and down so there was no doubt about what he meant.

  Wes put him on the couch, wrapped him in a blanket and then didn't join him under it.

  "At least sit with me and let me put my feet in your lap."

  "My lap is off limits," Wes said.

  "For a guy who was this close to doing it with me the second we met, you sure are making me work for it."

  "You think throwing my bad judgment in my face is going to help your cause?"

  "I don't know. I'm a desperate man. I'm throwing everything and the kitchen sink at you."

  While the snow rushed past the windows, the two of them sat together but too far apart for Colin's liking. The whiteout and the loud howling of the wind outside made Colin want to stay put. He fell asleep on the couch. The last thing he remembered was Wes clicking off the TV and whispering good night.

  *

  Before Colin came along, Wes liked to start his mornings with a workout. He had to change his routine once his gym became Colin's bedroom. Since Colin was still asleep on the couch, Wes returned to his old habit just for this morning. He was finishing up his workout, wiping down the equipment when Colin came to the door.

  "Woo hoo! Hot, hot, hot!"

  "Are you ogling me?" Wes asked though Colin's visual strip search was so thorough it couldn't be missed.

  "Damn right. And if you turn around, I'll ogle you some more."

  Wes did turn around but only to walk away. And, yes, Colin did hoot appreciatively at seeing his ass.

  After Wes came back from his shower, he found Colin standing where he had left him but with a towel around his neck and wet hair from his own shower.

  "You should clear out this stuff." Colin gestured at the exercise equipment.

  "You need more room?" Wes asked. "I can put at least some of it in my bedroom."

  "No. But you don't need this stuff. I can be your workout. You can bench-press me and bend me over the barbell stand to fuck me."

  "Only one of those is an exercise," Wes told him and headed to the kitchen.

  "Right. The fucking," Colin said as he followed him.

  After breakfast Colin was antsy. Wes planned to go to his office, but he had a feeling he wouldn't get any work done with Colin climbing the walls.

  "The storm blew over last night. There's no reason why you can't go out and see your friends," Wes told him.

  "Are you trying to get rid of me?"

  "I think you need more company and more entertainment than I can provide."

  "I don't need entertainment. I'm easy. As long as you feed me and give me a roof over my head, I'm yours."

  "Other than a roof over your head, there isn't much else I can give you."

  "You can give me that hot workout we talked about."

  "Good idea. Let's go take a walk."

  "You took that totally the wrong way," Colin told him. Seeing Wes put on his jacket and try to hand Colin his, he drew back. "A walk in this freezing weather?"

  "It's not so bad. Are you coming?"

  Colin took his jacket reluctantly.

  Last night's blizzard had blanketed everything in an even covering of white. The winds exhausted themselves in the night leaving the air very still. Windless and deserted, all around them the park was as frozen as a picture. The path they took had already been marred by footprints. As they turned to head toward the Riverwalk, theirs were the first footsteps to break through the solid layer of white. The path further away was lost under the snow, but Wes followed it from memory.

  "Brisk walk in the freezing weather, brilliant idea. I can't believe I'm letting you drag me out here. That's how devoted I am to you," Colin griped.

  Wes found the cold and the energetic walk to keep from freezing invigorating. He needed the reminder that he was warm blooded and alive. He looked over at Colin's face, cheeks red, breath coming out in white puffs. He was the embodiment of life and heat. No wonder he complained about being dragged out into this bleak landscape where even the air was frozen. Even out here, Wes knew that if he reached under Colin's clothes, he would find so much warmth.

  Dwelling on him, Wes was letting Colin's body, with all its appeal, take over his imagination. He got a clear picture of Colin's naked limbs wrapping around him. He turned away to immerse his vision in the stark landscape reduced to severe lines and only a few colors. Branches were bare, decorated with frost. Wet snow had frozen and it crunched under their feet. Nature was so still and brittle in winter. It cracked under human touch. It was hard to believe that this park was once so vibrantly green with leaves shimmering in the sun.

  "You must be a Yeti if this isn't killing you," Colin said.

  "How can you still be cold after all this walking?"

  "I'm freezing. No one else could get me out here to traipse around for no reason. Even this can't make me not like you."

  "What's to like?" Wes wondered.

  "You! You're tasty and you know it. Plus you are a good guy." Because of Wes's reaction, he added, "Don't scoff. Not everyone is, you know."

  "I tried to pay you for sex. I tried to take advantage of your desperation."

  "You mean you failed to take advantage of my desperate need for cock," Colin told him. "And just so you know, I'll need a lot more from you to satisfy me now."

  "Don't hold your breath," Wes told him.

  "Because you might go crazy any minute? I was reading up on it. You might be out of the danger zone. If you didn't lose it in your teens or twenties, you're kind of, sort of in the clear."

  Wes only smiled at him since it was obvious that Colin realized there was still a danger. Too bad he wasn't scared away by that. Instead of being discouraged, Colin seemed bolder since he found out about Wes. Maybe Wes should have expected that someone as young as Colin would find real obstacles unconvincing. To Colin every obstacle was a mirage, and he looked right through it and only saw the object of his desire. That's why Wes would have to keep reality firmly in his sights for both their sakes. That wasn't easy as Colin turned suddenly and stopped right in front of him.

  "I just realized what you're up to. You're trying to freeze out all the sexy thoughts you're having about me. It won't work you know," Colin said and plastered himself to Wes.

  Even through all the layers of clothing between them, Wes still felt the effect of being close to him. Colin took his breath away with his searching eyes that slowly stilled, with his pouting mouth, with the way his arms encircled Wes so he couldn't step away.

  "Are you done? Have you made your point yet?" Wes asked him.

  "What are you complaining about? We're just sharing body heat."

  They were doing more than that. Colin was giving Wes a taste of what it would be like to be with him. He felt solid and strong in Wes's arms and oh, so good. Wes didn't want to let go. He was surprised when Colin did.

  "Move before we turn into statues," Colin told him brusquely. Maybe he wasn't ready for what might happen either.

  *

  They were about to cross the street when a man in front of the apartment building caught Colin's eye. The man paced and looked agitated. As they moved toward him, Colin tried to convince himself he was wrong. When he turned to them angrily, there was no doubt about who he was.

  "Uncle Hal," Colin said. He wanted to ask him what the hell he was doing there, but he still had some small hope that this wouldn't turn ugly.

  Uncle Hal looked from him to Wes with a snarl. His eyes and his face were red. Colin was sure it wasn't from the cold. God knows how much he had to drink. But the bigger question was what did he want.

  "What's this? What the fuck is this?!" Uncle Hal yelled blasting Colin with his booze breath as he came barreling at him. He jabbed his finger in Wes's direction.

  It was only through force of will that Colin didn't step back from him.

  "This is a friend of mine and nothing to be yelling about in the street," Colin told him, keeping his voice deliberately low.


  "Shut your mouth, you piece of trash. You shame this family. You shame your mother!"

  Colin tried to harden himself against those words. "I'm not doing anything wrong," he said as calmly as he could.

  Uncle Hal reached for him. His fingers only just grabbed hold of the front of Colin's jacket when Colin pushed them off. Being older now than when they lived with him, Colin felt more capable of dealing with his uncle, but Wes stepped in anyway.

  "That's enough," Wes said. His back was to Colin. He blocked his view of Uncle Hal completely.

  "Hey, Wes, not your fight," Colin said to him. His voice was low, but he was sure Wes heard him. He didn't budge though so Colin had to step to the side to get around him. Wes's arm went up protectively.

  Colin could see where things stood. Wes was cold as ice and watchful. He stood between Colin and his uncle like an impenetrable wall. Muscle-bound and drunk, Uncle Hal wasn't intimidated by Wes.

  Uncle Hal swung at him. Colin knew that his fist was like having a wrecking ball coming at your head. Wes veered right as he deflected the blow with his left. Judging by his moves, he knew what he was doing.

  The way the blow missed unbalanced Uncle Hal, but he recovered. He aimed his next punch at Wes's middle. It was sloppy, but Wes was too close to dodge. He turned to the side so the force of it didn't hit him fully. Immediately, he countered. With the flat of his hand, he hit Uncle Hal in the center of his chest. He lurched and slipped. Wes used that against him instantly. Twisting his arm behind his back, he smashed Uncle Hal into the building. He pressed him there with his weight. As far as Colin could tell, Wes wasn't doing any real damage to him, just restraining him. Uncle Hal's struggle was unfocused. His breathing sounded rough and unhealthy. Colin didn't think he had much fight left in him.

  Once Wes felt him stop struggling, he looked at Colin. Colin nodded to Wes to let him go. Released, Uncle Hal teetered for a moment. Colin thought he might have to catch him to keep him from smashing his head open on the sidewalk. Uncle Hal coughed, leaning over like he was going to throw up. When he straightened, Colin went up to him. Out of the corner of his eyes, he saw Wes get ready to step in again.

  "You have nothing to say to me. Don't ever come back here," Colin told Uncle Hal.

  Uncle Hal glared at him, but then he started coughing again and staggered away.

  "Way to ruin a nice walk," Colin said as he and Wes went up in the elevator.

  "You hated the walk."

  He didn't. Colin didn't hate any time spent with Wes. He just liked to keep him on his toes. Seeing him deal with his uncle, Colin admired how calm he had been. But now that he was watching him going into the apartment and taking his jacket off, Colin chose to admire some of his other qualities.

  "So this awesome body isn't just for show," Colin praised him as his bulky jacket came off and his body was a little more visible.

  "I got lucky. Your uncle would have had the better of me if he had been sober," Wes said.

  "That's never," Colin told him. "He is pretty strong. Big muscles run in the family. You should see Tim. I'm the runt of the litter." Colin looked down at himself. Next to an average guy, he looked OK, but for some reason he was always surrounded by muscly guys, big guys, or both.

  "You're perfect," Wes said without thinking.

  "Prove it. Grab yourself a slice of perfection," Colin challenged him.

  "I meant that you are perfect in your own way," Wes said, trying to downgrade his compliment.

  "But not irresistible since I am still very much unfucked."

  "This is really not the best time to talk about that."

  Colin did have other things on his mind. He wondered about how Uncle Hal knew where to find him and about Wes. The only people who knew where he worked and lived were his friends. None of them knew his uncle. But Brad did. He knew where Uncle Hal lived, what he was like, and that he had it in for Colin. If Brad saw Colin leave work and go home with Wes, he might have been the one who told him. Now Colin had to worry about what either one of them might tell Tim.

  Chapter 10

  That morning, Wes had glimpsed Colin walking groggily to the bathroom. He had only seen enough to notice that those weren't his usual sweats and to memorize how the fabric showed off the curve of his ass. When Colin came to the kitchen, Wes got a better look. The way the pajama bottoms clung to him, he might as well have been naked. Wes took too long to look away. Now he could feel his dick reacting to the sight. Of course there was no chance that Colin wasn't aware of what he was doing to him. One look at his eyes would confirm it, but Wes refused to look back in his direction.

  "My eyes are up here," Colin said, admitting his guilt.

  "I'm not looking at any part of you," Wes told him and busied himself with toast.

  "Not looking at me so deliberately is as good as eating me up with your eyes."

  "It's not even close," Wes said. He wished he could get his fill of looking at Colin, but looking at him for even a second longer would have cost him all of his self-control. Colin would be naked on the floor under him not standing there gloating.

  Mercifully, after breakfast Colin went to his room to change, and Wes went to tend to his hard-on.

  What happened that morning, and the constant frisson he felt whenever he was near Colin, told Wes that something might happen no matter how hard he resisted. Being around Colin was dangerous. But there was no relief even when Colin went to work. He haunted Wes just as much when he was gone, maybe more since he wasn't as much on his guard against a ghost.

  When Wes was alone in the apartment, traces of Colin's scent made him shudder. Colin's eyes smiled at him. His mouth was soft on Wes's lips then dragged down his body, lower and lower. Wasn't this insanity, to see and smell and hear someone who wasn't there, to feel his mouth wrapping tightly around his cock? Wes had invited sweet chaos into his life and now he was drowning in it. His carefully ordered existence was blown apart.

  To try and clear his head of Colin, Wes went for a walk. But wherever he went, he couldn't escape him. Wes's stride was long and determined. Frozen puddles cracked under his heavy feet. Cold air was stabbing at his lungs as he walked fast and breathed hard. Icy winds were solid as they hit back, chilling his face into a mask of numbness, making his chest ache with every breath he took. As he rushed nowhere, he felt disengaged from every sensation in his body. All his efforts were given over to trying to escape his attraction to a vulnerable young man who was too young for him.

  Dogged and unyielding, Colin was pulling Wes in, and Wes was getting closer to giving in all the time. He could feel himself standing on the edge of the cliff and falling. All these years he tried to stay on solid ground, but finally the truth was exposed that his fate was never in his hands. Colin just had to show up in his life with his freewheeling ways and his irrational optimism, and Wes was lost. Why even fight it? He had to fight it for Colin's sake. Even if he was willing to give up on saving himself, he couldn't let Colin fall with him.

  Wes went home with some fresh resolve. Sitting at his computer in his office, he lost himself in his work for hours. Then as soon as he heard Colin come through the door, Wes felt his heart start to beat faster. There was no hope that Colin wouldn't come into his office. Wes could feel him right behind him as he tried to sneak in. Then he felt his ice cold fingers as Colin slipped just his fingertips down the back of his collar. Wes barely flinched. Holding his breath, he waited for the fleeting sensation to pass. He felt singed by cold skin and the burning warmth underneath.

  "What are you made of? My fingers are like ice," Colin said as he pulled his hand back.

  "You have gloves. Please wear them. If you don't like them, I'll get you others," Wes told him, trying to focus on something practical and not the turmoil inside him.

  "I was texting. But I like your motherly concern."

  Wes sighed and turned back to his work. As he tried to concentrate, he could feel Colin's expectant eyes on him. He had noticed Wes's surly mood, but instead of leaving him alone,
he waited. Why did he have to make this so hard? As if the tension in Wes acted like a magnet, Colin just wouldn't leave him alone.

  Feeling Colin's hands on him again, he tensed. Colin's skin was already warmer. His touch was just as startling but softer and somehow more demanding. The contact burned him up inside, and Wes pushed away his hand as gently and firmly as he could.

  As Wes gave him a stern, warning glare, the seductive look on Colin's face turned sulky. He still looked too good to ignore.

  "I can see you're bored, but find something to do somewhere else. I have work to finish." Wes did his best to keep his voice cold while his insides were on fire. He stayed stone-faced as Colin started to seethe.

  "You know what this is about, and it's not boredom," Colin said, trying to sound reasonable, but then he snapped. "This impassive shit is pissing me off!" He paced around the room and took a few deep breaths. "Sorry. I guess you have the right not to want me."

  "You guess?" Wes said acidly.

  Colin turned and frowned at his tone. "Fine. You don't have the right not to want me when I want you so much. Happy?" he said, being deliberately unreasonable now. Then he took it a step further.

  Coming closer, he grabbed Wes's face with one hand. With his other hand, he gripped the back if Wes's chair to brace himself and to keep Wes from moving back. Wes only had time to open his mouth with Colin's name halfway to his lips. Colin's mouth was on his, hard and hot. The kiss was lightning fast and bruising, as jarring as an electric shock. The rough kiss didn't last long. It was harsh and angry, but it tasted of Colin, and that was all Wes needed to send him clear out of his mind.

  Wes regrouped quickly but only enough to put on a mask. Acting like nothing had happened, inside, he reeled while his heart pounded a loud drumbeat in his ears.

  "Don't pretend nothing happened, you cold-blooded bastard," Colin said. He was breathless and still mad.

  "A lot less happened than you think," Wes said as he tried to get his own breathing to even out.