Make It Better (Gay Romance) Read online

  As they moved into the bedroom, they were both a little bit nervous. It was the nervousness of excitement, anticipation, and a little worry that it wouldn’t be everything they had hoped for. It felt like it was their first time. And in a way it was.

  They stripped each other slowly, sharing nervous looks and smirking at each other. At first, they kissed sweetly then deeper and harder. Building up to the moment, they caressed each other, standing pressed together. Their touch grew more urgent and demanding until they each kneeled to take turns and blow each other a little.

  Ray pulled Marcus to the bed. Reaching a state where he couldn’t keep his hands off Marcus, he groped everything he could. Marcus was kissing the inside of his thigh and up to his balls. Ray felt his skin getting hot, burning up. It was almost too much. Ray couldn’t settle down and accepted Marcus’s attentions to his body. Ray had to have his cock,

  Ray turned got on all fours then he waited for his touch. It came a moment later warm, firm, and urgent. As Marcus lubed him, Ray could tell how much he wanted him. His fingers plunged in deep and fast. This was the touch of a man who couldn’t wait. Ray moaned with utter happiness and this wasn’t even the main attraction, just the opening act, so to speak. His two fingers were such excruciatingly sweet preparation for what was to come. As he pushed back into it, the thorough fingering stopped. Ray groaned at the loss. His need was so desperate now. Ray could feel Marcus shift behind him and position his body for greater leverage. His fingers returned to probe the edge of Ray’s hole. This was a teasing touch right before he entered him. Ray could enjoy the excruciating tenderness of it and still look forward to the fulfillment his cock would give him. He felt the warmth of Marcus’s hands, their firm pressure on his ass cheeks. As he held his breath, Ray felt Marcus’s cock nudging against his hole. Ray pushed back too eagerly and missed. Marcus held him still, more firmly this time, and pressed insistently until he was stretching him slowly, driving him out of his mind in the most wonderful way. Marcus obviously knew what he was doing so Ray didn’t dare interfere. He let him set the pace. Once he was filling him, Marcus stopped. Ray enjoyed the completed connection between them like they were one being on the edge of incredible pleasure, perfectly in tune. Marcus pulled back making Ray shake then pushed in again sending a surge of power through him. Another thrust and the wave of pleasure made Ray’s cock hard as steel. His whole body felt transformed into something harder and stronger than before. In that moment, Marcus was the center of his universe. His whole awareness focused on him, that piece of Marcus inside him, working his body, taking it over. It felt natural and perfect. Marcus’s hands held him lightly at first then with a firmer grip as his thrusts gained power. Ray wanted to make demands, do it hard, do it forever, but he just grunted instead as Marcus ploughed him. Marcus stopped just as Ray reached the edge of pain. Ray panted waiting for more. He hadn’t even noticed how the sweat dripped off him.

  “I think I like this,” Marcus said as he lubed his cock again. He was a little out of breath.

  “I knew you would,” Ray gasped.

  “This isn’t the time for I told you so’s.”

  “It’s time to fuck my ass.”

  “So romantic.”

  “Don’t tease.”

  “Thank you for this,” Marcus said. His breath was warm on the back of Ray’s neck as he spoke. Ray wanted to turn and kiss him, but Marcus straightened again and plunged inside him. Ray felt his power once more as well as his own. Marcus was pumping hard, answering a deep need in his own body and fulfilling the need in Ray’s. His strength surprised, almost overwhelmed Ray. He held his position with effort as his pounding became relentless and unstoppable, reaching for the climax. Marcus came with a roar thrusting deep until Ray was flat against the mattress, pushed down under his weight. Ray felt him come, heard him groan his name several times into his ear. Staying inside him, Marcus pulled him up. Marcus breathed deep, heaving breaths. His hand slid over Ray’s cock lightly, the perfect touch, all Ray needed in his state. Marcus’s hand wrapped around with one final decisive squeeze and he came. Pulsing come over his hand and over his sheets, Ray yelled Marcus’s name twice before he collapsed into a messy, happy, half conscious heap of spent flesh.

  The rest of that day was spent in a daze. He and Marcus wasted the day together, never doing much and hardly moving at all. It was a good Sunday. That night there was no heavy action, but they still made each other come. Their need was constant never satisfied for long before it needed to be satisfied again. Like hunger or thirst, it seemed to be endless.

  In the morning, when Ray woke up, Marcus was still asleep. One hand was under the pillow, the other one was curled in front of him like it should be held. Ray didn’t succumb to the temptation to touch him. He let Marcus sleep, envying him as he dragged himself out of bed.

  Ray’s eyes were closing a little as he went into the shower. That previous day and night had been wonderful but not restful. His eyelids were heavy as he turned the shower to a colder setting to wake him up a little. Ray dressed quietly while watching Marcus sleep. Sometimes seeing a little twitch of his face or his toes, he’d wait for him to wake up, but he kept sleeping. It seemed like such a luxury to be able to see him like this. Ray wished he didn’t have to go to work. Making sure not to say anything too sappy, he left him a note saying that he was wonderful and that he wouldn’t be disappointed to find him there when he got back home.

  *

  Waking up in Ray’s bed, Marcus searched for him automatically. The amount of light flooding the bedroom told him that he wouldn’t find him. It was midmorning on a workday. Ray was gone. For a while, lying on Ray’s bed consoled him in Ray’s absence. Then darker thoughts started to crowd his mind. He felt a sharp condemnation stab through him. How could he lie around comforting himself about a lover gone for a few hours? His brother and sister were gone forever. There was no lover’s bed or morning sunshine for them. Marcus felt driven to leave this place full of happy memories. But he forced himself to stay long enough to write Ray a note. That’s when he saw that Ray had written him one too.

  Ray’s note was a gently invitation that Marcus couldn’t accept. He held his note for a long time just staring at the words and saying “I’m sorry.” He wrote his own note, making sure not to put any sadness in his words.

  After their first meeting, Marcus hadn’t been sure he would ever see him again. Now he only needed to know when and where they would meet. He had no doubt that Ray would call, but he didn’t expect it to take so long.

  *

  Instead of Marcus, Ray found only a note on his bed. “I wish I could stay. Thank you for letting me sleep and exhausting me into it.” That’s all it said other than his name, but Ray couldn’t bring himself to throw it away. As he put it in the drawer, he noticed that it was written on the back of Ray’s note. His eye lingered on Marcus’s handwriting, his words “I wish I could stay.” Why couldn’t he? There was his greed again. Ray had monopolized him for the whole weekend, and he wanted him to stay longer. Going out then staying in, it had been the perfect weekend with a perfect finish. Though it had been tiring, Ray was exhilarated by the thought of it and of seeing Marcus again. But he didn't dare invite him yet. It was too soon after more than two whole days spent together. Ray didn’t want Marcus to get tired of him. Because of his stupid sense of restraint and propriety, by Tuesday night, Ray was aching for him.

  Marcus was very curt on the phone when he asked him to come over. Even though he agreed very quickly, Ray was worried that Marcus was mad at him for some reason.

  “Where have you been?” Marcus asked as soon as Ray opened the door to him.

  “What do you mean ‘where’?” Ray asked a little bewildered.

  “You didn’t call.”

  Ray was a little shocked at him.

  “You have a phone too. You don’t know how to dial?” Ray accused him though they had silently agreed to this arrangement, the time and place set by Ray as his “sex therapist”.


  As soon as he was through the door and it was shut, Marcus grabbed Ray’s hand and put it on his crotch.

  “That’s where I am,” he said. Ray could feel his rock hard erection through the rough fabric of his jeans.

  With his arm hooked around Ray’s neck, Marcus kissed him. Not liking that they weren’t at the same stage of arousal, he didn’t even let Ray breathe. Marcus unzipped him and stroked him until he was almost as hard as him then went into the bedroom ahead of him. Remembering where he kept them, he grabbed the lube and condom. Marcus threw the condom to him and pulled down his jeans but didn’t take them off. He fingered himself roughly, even groaning a few times from the penetration of his own lubed fingers. Pulling his hand out of his way, Ray could see Marcus’s dick sticking up, dripping with extreme arousal. Marcus bent double on the edge of the bed. Ray wanted him turned around so he could look at him, but he was moaning so loud Ray knew he needed to satisfy him quickly. He took the lube from him and applied more.

  “That’s enough, that’s enough,” Marcus kept telling him, but he didn’t listen. Ray put more than enough. In his impatience and to help him out, Marcus spread his ass cheeks for him. Ray loved his naked hunger for his cock, and he pushed aside any worries. This was how it was supposed to be.

  Sighing deeply at the intrusion of Ray’s well lubed fingers, Marcus spread his ass wider. Marcus moaned as the fingers were withdrawn. He shuddered when the head of Ray’s cock replaced his fingers. Ray pushed all the way in then pressed down so Marcus could feel it to his core. Marcus gasped and groaned loudly. Ray didn’t let him rest. He fucked him with long, steady strokes to open him up for the more strenuous fucking he needed. Ray built up to it with each thrust, coming in harder until he was hammering him. There was a sound of pain, and Ray stopped in mid thrust, holding his breath. He was afraid to move in either direction.

  “I’m sorry.”

  “Don’t worry about it. Don’t stop. Keep going,” Marcus insisted, but Ray could hear pain in his voice and even in his breathing. Ray felt Marcus trying to overcome the dictates of his own body. He wanted to force himself to take more than he could.

  “No way,” Ray refused and pulled out very slowly letting Marcus’s body guide him so there would be no more pain.

  Marcus was disappointed but he understood that Ray couldn’t hurt him. Ray regretted that he had fucked him so roughly, maybe too soon after the last time. Now Marcus couldn’t take any more even though he wanted to. Ray kissed each of Marcus’s ass cheeks in apology.

  Ray stripped him then himself. He frowned when Marcus winced as he turned on the bed to lie on his back.

  “It’s OK. It’s going away,” he reassured him. Then he said, “I’ll never doubt you again,”

  “When did you doubt me, and what did you doubt me about?” Ray asked as he crawled over him.

  “You’re so nice and sweet and … What’s the word? Domestic,” he said like nice and sweet wasn’t bad enough.

  Ray threw a pillow at him. Marcus caught it and put it under his head then continued.

  “It’s just hard to imagine that you are such a fierce fuck machine.” he was making fun of him again. Not that Ray deserved better treatment since he had caused him pain. But now he was determined to make up for that.

  Settling between Marcus’s legs, Ray leaned down over his cock. It had slackened only a little at the pain and now was back to its full hardness with only a little help from Ray. Hearing Marcus catch his breath at the first light touch of his lips to the wet tip, he went slow. Ray let Marcus’s cock part his lips, nudge them apart and slide over his tongue as he slowly inched down. Marcus panted. As the head hit the back of his throat, Ray stopped. Using his tongue along the way, he pulled back up. Marcus was writhing and cursing. Ray felt Marcus’s engorged cock shifting in his mouth from his wild motion. Without meaning to, he was pumping into Ray’s mouth. Ray loved to feel Marcus’s cock pushing anywhere inside him, but Marcus stopped, making his body subside and wait for Ray. Marcus was such a good guy. Ray let his tongue play over his cock again to see if he could make him surge into his mouth again. His willpower was strong. Marcus threw his head back and moaned but didn’t move. Seeing that he couldn’t be tricked again, Ray gave up. Now he was sucking harder all the time, dying for him to come. Ray pulled him in so hard and so far he almost choked, but he didn’t stop. Marcus came with a yell that thrilled him. His hot salty come was all Ray’s. He gulped it down feeling happy. He only stopped sucking when he was ready to come himself. Joining his hand with Ray’s for the last few strokes, Marcus aimed Ray’s cock at his own chest. He groaned as his front was streaked with come. He wiped Ray’s come off his chest in quick swipes and licked his fingers. Then he leaned down to Ray’s cock and sucked the last few drops off the tip. Marcus pulled Ray down into a long slow kiss, their salty mouths wet, sliding, tasting. Ray didn’t care if he ever breathed again. Marcus was the first to gasp for breath. He laughed. At that moment, Ray knew they hadn’t just made each other come, they had made each other truly happy.

  They jumped in the shower then ate some leftovers before getting back into bed. Resting a minute against the foot of the bed, Ray admired Marcus. He gripped his feet, going gently with the foot that looked damaged, then slid his hands up his hairy legs. His hands went up his flat stomach to his chest. Lying on top of him, Ray flattened himself against him. As he kissed his shoulder, he enjoyed the press of their bodies, the fit of his body against Marcus’s but especially his hands kneading Ray’s ass. Lifting his head, he looked into Marcus’s dark eyes. With that, he began to kiss his mouth, gently then deeply while he rubbed his head and his very short hair. Marcus was hardening against his thigh. Ray kissed his way down to his crotch, rubbing his face against the hairs that started under his navel. Marcus made appreciative sounds as he neared the target. The sounds got louder and more intense as he started sucking. Marcus let him do as he pleased for a while. Then, stopping him with a hand on his forehead, he sat up. As Ray got back to sucking, Marcus reached behind him to finger him vigorously. With those fingers sliding up his ass, Ray had to focus hard. He had to concentrate on what he was doing to Marcus, not so much on what Marcus was doing to his ass. Ray loved the way those fingers were pushing inside him. There were three of them in him now, plunging in, kneading his insides. Ray felt that Marcus had learned the workings of his body in a new way, reaching in deeper than ever before. Ray sucked to the rhythm Marcus set for him. Ray was guided by him. Marcus’s hand moved him like Ray was his instrument. And Ray’s mouth played on him like Marcus was his. They were seamlessly connected. They were one. They were an unending sound of pleasure that came out of Marcus and ran through Ray and then went back through Marcus again. Ray was saying Marcus’s name in his head as he tasted him, as his come flowed down his throat completing him.

  Marcus had hurried to get to Ray’s cock before he came. He wanted Ray to finish in his mouth. He got his wish. Ray looked down at Marcus’s dark head in his lap as he finished sucking him off. Marcus had pushed him back roughly, in a hurry to get his mouth on his cock before he started coming. Now he licked the last drops of his come from his lips and rubbed the back of his head against Ray’s thigh. Looking at him, Ray felt that their connection from before was unbroken. Their coming didn’t end it, which meant it wasn’t about sex. Their connection held because it was too powerful to break.

  Ray shook his head trying to dispel these strange thoughts. Marcus looked up at him. There it was, in his eyes. Did Marcus feel it too? But Ray couldn’t even be sure of what he felt in his own mind, in his heart. His feelings were too sudden and too strong. How could he trust them? He had to wonder if to him, Marcus wasn’t just a younger, more approachable version of Lionel.

  As he looked at Marcus and tried to figure him out, Ray wanted to cover up how he had made him feel. But Marcus was looking at him so frankly and openly, he couldn’t. Ray smiled at him like a fool. Marcus smiled too but then he pulled away from him and sat up against the headboard. And Ra
y had just reached for him to kiss him. Now he stopped. Something had happened.

  Marcus looked around the room as if he was looking for something that was different, but he wasn’t sure what it was. When his look passed over him, Ray couldn’t catch his eye. Before he could ask him what was the matter, Marcus stretched out and closed his eyes. He wasn’t sleeping. He wasn’t even resting. It was more like he was trying to shut everything out, pull himself back and away from everything around him. Ray saw his breathing quicken then slow. They both stayed like that for a while, motionless. Marcus was lying there with his eyes closed, almost like someone pretending to sleep. Ray watched his chest rise and fall. He noticed the too prominent outline of his ribcage. His breathing never quieted enough for him to be asleep.

  Ray’s concern kept him awake for a while, but not long enough. He wasn’t surprised that when he woke up in the middle of the night, Marcus wasn’t there. Marcus had left silently. Though he searched, he didn’t find a note.

  *

  Marcus felt his heart slowly, painfully hardening as he walked away from Ray. He had looked down on Ray sleeping and said a silent goodbye.

  Ray was a gift that wasn’t meant for him. But he had opened it and claimed it without thinking. And all he had to think of was who had given him this gift. No doubt his uncle Lionel gave many gifts like these. He did have excellent taste. And in Ray, his uncle had unknowingly found something real under all that beautiful wrapping. But Ray was made to love and be loved by someone who deserved him. And Marcus didn’t deserve love. He didn’t deserve sleep, or rest. He only deserved to live as long as he remembered what he had done. With Ray, Marcus couldn’t remember properly. Ray softened his memories, made him think of Vicky and Jake as smiling kids. And even their fights and the times they were angry at him or each other were only bittersweet not searing and streaked with pain.